C is for Confidence

What does it mean to feel confident?

How do you build confidence in that tiny human you are raising?

Imagine yourself driving along listening to your favorite playlist. A song streams through your speakers and you recognize it in just a few intro notes. That’s it. That’s confidence. A feeling of comfort in your surroundings. This is what your child wants and needs to feel. You can’t provide this feeling in every situation, but the more that you can provide it for your child in the first three years of life, the easier your child will be able to cope in situations where they may NOT be feeling confident. 

What are some simple ways to build your child’s confidence playlist? 

1. Create a schedule – at least a few activities that structure the day. When your child can anticipate how the day will unfold, they will be able to relax and feel at peace. Don’t you feel more relaxed when you have a plan? Children don’t need constant activity, just constancy of the day.

2. Respond to your child’s needs with care and consideration. Parenting in the early years is exhausting but it is fleeting. If you can prioritize snuggling, reading, playing, laughing, being silly . . . if you can prioritize bonding, you and your child will reap the benefits.

3. Be the compass. Remember that the first 3 years are an explosion of change. Each week can seem endless as you try to figure out how to parent. Your child is also facing new challenges on the journey and is constantly reliant on you. Don’t expect your child to make decisions that are beyond them. You decide the path and remove obstacles along the way.

If we want our children to feel confident, then we must help them feel connected. As parents, it is a simple role and yet, as a society, we misunderstand a child’s desire to test independence with a readiness to separate. You will never know the last time that your child will ask for help. Hold them, help them, guide them, love them. These early years are all we are given for this uncompromised focus of love and it is fleeting.